Friday, January 3, 2014

The Power of the Temple against Social Anxiety

I hope you all survived the holidays...you know what I mean, socializing, parties, and more parties. Did I mention parties?
"I want to stop by and drop off a gift for you"
"Are you coming to the work party?"
"Are you coming to the ward party?"
"Are you coming to the relief society party?"
No, no, no and no.

Luckily I made it through and hope you did too!

Before I jump into how the temple has helped me with my social anxiety, I just want to say to all my readers, whether reading for yourselves or to help you understand the ones you love, that I thank you for your heart-felt comments. It warms my heart to know that by sharing my story I have helped someone else and I'm grateful for you and want you to know I have a special place in my heart for my readers and have such hopes for your success to conquer social anxiety and be happy.

With that said, let me share with you something huge I found that helped me rise above my fears and constant cycle of struggling to go to church: Going to the temple.

Now before you revolt and say, "Go to the temple? Are you kidding me I can barely get myself to church!" Please stay with me because believe me, I GET IT! You don't even want to know how hard it was for me to go to the temple in the first place.

A couple of months ago, I felt like my husband and I should go to the temple (evidently I was not in one of my weaker SA states). We committed on a day to go and I was totally gung-ho about it. I knew it was something we should have been doing consistently, but I'll admit, it also was a big source of anxiety for me that I tried just to block out.

Do to the sacred nature of the temple, I won't go into details, but participating in the ordinances there means you are actively involved and participating and therefore, exposing yourself to possible episodes of anxiety because you are out participating and not sitting at home.

I was all set to go. As the day grew closer I began giving myself pep talks. And then the day came. But as my husband began to get dressed in his Sunday best, it all went downhill. I had a major melt down and told him I didn't think I could go.

Luckily, my husband is as sweet and kind as they come, and said we didn't have to go if it was making me feel this anxious. Inside the battle raged. I knew I needed to go and I had to put my faith in Heavenly Father that if I did this good thing that He would help me get through it.

So we went. And He did.


Excerpt from Come to the Temple (an official church publication):

The temple endowment ordinances enrich in three ways: (a) The one receiving the ordinance is given power from God. “Recipients are endowed with power from on high.” (b) A recipient is also endowed with information and knowledge. “They receive an education relative to the Lord’s purposes and plans.”  (c) When sealed at the altar a person is the recipient of glorious blessings, powers, and honors as part of his or her endowment.

We have been taught that we can receive power from on high if we attend the temple, and if anyone needed power, I did. Power to overcome. Power to persevere. Power not to be afraid. And I received it.

By attending the temple I was reminded why I am a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints. I was reminded about the love of the gospel. I was reminded why I live the way I live and commit to the things I do. I was reminded about all the good and beautiful things about this church of which I am part. I was reminded about my commitments, covenants and promises and the blessings I am promised if I keep them. And I felt good.

And the next day was Sunday. And as if by magic, I didn't have ANY thoughts of not going to church. What?? I know, believe me, I was just as surprised as you are. I felt powerful. I felt connected and committed in a way I hadn't in a very long time. Thoughts of not going to church were non-existent and I went to church and felt myself begin to get stronger.

And not only do I believe that going to the temple helped me see going to church in a whole different light and take the struggle with going/not-going away, it also helped me in other areas of my life like going to work. Meetings didn't seem as anxiety-producing. Other situations that would have made me want to run and hide didn't affect me as much. I had received the promised power and I couldn't deny it.

As with anything that is connected to receive power, one must continue to "conduct" by going to the temple. In time I've noticed that doubts have begun to creep in again and not going to church once again "becomes an option". I know it's time to go back to the temple and to keep going so my power doesn't have time to fade.

It's miraculous. I hope you find the strength to go to the temple, despite how anxious you might be about it because you will receive power, as is promised. And the wonderful thing about going is that you are not only helping yourself, but others who can't do the work for themselves. It doesn't get better than that!

"So come to the temple - come and claim your blessings." Come to the Temple, Preparing to Enter the Holy Temple, (2002), 1–37


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